In Defense of Roller Skating

One day last week, my daughter, Cate, announced to me that she was ready to begin roller skating. I said that was great! Let’s do it! Let’s hit the pavement! Woo hoo! In case you can’t tell, I was very excited. Then she proceeded to explain to me all the “gear” she was going to need before we even began to put on our skates. “Mom,” she says, “I’m gonna need a helmet, elbow pads, knee pads, and gloves for my hands in case I fall and scrape them.”

“Hold up, ” said I. “Where did you learn that you need all that ridiculous stuff in order just to roller skate?” I cringed at the notion that a favorite pastime, a rite of passage for kids, was being dumbed down because of the fear propaganda this country thrives on. For heaven’s sake let’s not let our children fall and scrape a knee, an elbow, or get a scratch on the forehead.

I explained to her that when I was a kid, we strapped on our skates and hit the concrete and that was all there was to it. “But, mom, what if you fall down and get a boo boo?”  I told her we put a band-aid on the boo boo, put our skates back on, and continued on our merry way. “But mom, can you skate with a boo boo?” At this point I’m seeing red. What are our kids learning when they’re not with us? Colored terror threat alerts, hiding under their desks in case of bomb threats, wrapping themselves in bubble wrap before they make an attempt at any kind of play?

“Cate,” I said, “I am not buying knee pads or elbow pads. Maybe I’ll get you helmet, but mommy skated without any of these things and turned out just fine. And yes, you can still skate even if you get a boo boo. It’s not the end of the world. You won’t die. You won’t even end up in the hospital. Just make sure you fall on your ass and everything will be A-Ok.”

She reluctantly agreed with me. As a parent, I see it as my job to let my kids fall…both literally and figuratively speaking. Without falling, there will be no chance for them to get back up, learn from their mistakes, or gain self-confidence through practice and trial and error. We have to let our kids fail without fear of doing so. When they fall, we will pick them up, kiss their bumps and bruises and teach them the importance of keeping at something, not to quit, even if it hurts a little.

Life is messy and painful. But it is also blissful when we learn that the mess and pain are only momentary and can be transcended.

My kid’s head is rather large. She is a little top-heavy. MAYBE, she will get a helmet out of me. But that’s where I draw the line in the sand. She is going to get used to getting hurt. And after that she will learn that a scraped knee or elbow is nothing to fear.